Before the Mortal Instruments
by LifesDisgrace
Summary: This story is what happened before The Mortal Instruments Trilogy... Just a random thing I decided to do, not as bad as it sounds. It has some humor. All Character's POV
1. Rude Awakening

**Hi. Ummm this is me, LifesDisgrace. This is my first Mortal Instruments fanfic, annnd I'll try not to ruin a wonderful trilogy for you guys. This story is mostly in the mind set of Alec (Well, because he's my favorite character… He's totally awesome and I picture him as really hot, etc.) but not all in his point of view (I'll put who's POV in each chapter), before the whole series ever started (Before Jace ever met Clary… Before Alec ever met Magnus, all that) sooooo please enjoy…**

**Disclaimer: I should totally get Alec to do my disclaimers to make in funner haha XP. Anyway, I do not own anything from the Mortal Instruments Trilogy, the wonderful Cassandra Clare does. Soooo, there.**

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CHAPTER 1

*Alec's POV*

My alarm clock rang to early for me (This was the time of morning where you would think a rooster would… whatever they did cluck, crow?) I awoke from my sleep, once again without any dreams. I grudgingly turned around in my bed, and slammed a fist on the worthless piece of shit. Then, my too happy sister burst in, smelling strongly of roses. "Good morning, Alexander!" She spun around and pulled my curtains from the window, filling the room with an unbelievably bright white light. I moaned and squinted my eyes.

"Ugh, Isabelle! What the Hell?" I sat up and rubbed my face.

"It's morning, silly!" Like I didn't know that. She sat down beside, Indian style. She folded her arms across her chest and stared glumly at me. She was still in her pajamas, the silky short pink kind, I can't believe mom would actually let her wear something like that. Then again, mom wasn't here, and Isabelle was old enough to make her own decisions. I stared down at my long stripped pajama pants and black T-shirt. I sighed. "I made breakfast, I hope you're hungry!"

Oh boy! Every time Isabelle made FOOD, which was technically all the time, it was horrible. But, of course, nobody wanted to upset the only energetic life left in the Institute, so we ate. No matter how sick it made us. "Uhhh, thanks, Izzy… I'll be down in a minute."

She got a smirk on her face and skipped out. _How long would I be sick for this one? _I laid back down in my bed and closed my eyes. _She could handle a few more minutes without me. _

*Isabelle's POV*

I walked out of Alec's room. He didn't seem that excited to come down for breakfast, or to see me for that matter. Of course, he didn't really care about much, but still. His room was cleaner then the last time I had seen it, more orderly. _Oh, well. _

I walked down the stairs in my bare feet to the kitchen. The floor was much colder from the time I had gone to wake my brother up. I turned a couple bends to the kitchen to find everyone (Well, really just two people…) staring down at their food, mumbling. I cleared my throat. Their heads shot up and they practically ate their plates. I knew they didn't like my cooking. Guys never appreciated a woman's work, so why should we do shit for them?

I sat down beside my adopted brother, Jace. He stared at me with his beautiful golden eyes. He turned his head back down to stare at his "crap" that I had made, his curly golden hair falling in little ringlets around his perfectly angular face. "You know, Isabelle, you should really make your mom come back from Idris. She could _help _you in the kitchen. You make an awful mess."

Well, I couldn't argue with that (Well, partly). I do make a mess, but I always clean it up.

"Jace… Manners." A scruffy old voice came from the other side of the table. Hodge sat looking at his newspaper, completely content.

"You know, Izzy, this has been a terrific meal, it really has been, but you know there is this thing in the weapons room that I have… To… Fix." He got his jacket and backed out of the room, passing Alec in the doorway, who stared in disbelief after his impossible brother.

"Well, you know, I should follow him. You know Jace, he's always getting in trouble, constantly hurting himself, someone should go look after him…" And with that my "loyal" brother was gone also.

I curled up in my chair and let the familiar air of the Institute caress me.

*Jace's POV*

_Ugh! How the hell am I supposed to keep ditching meals like this? _I was starving. I hadn't had food in like a day and a half, but I snuck out of the Institute every one in a while to eat somewhere, often times Alec came with me. I headed to the weapons room.

The huge doors that led to the familiar room were surprisingly easy to open. I walked in, my boots scuffing the newly polished floors as I drug my feet slowly. I let the doors close behind me, and I was in heaven. The finest hunting equipment that we had lined to walls of the gothic structure. I sat down at a table that just so happened to have a couple Seraph blades on them. I wasn't really sure if Hodge had named them or not, but I didn't mess with them.

The heavy doors swung open again. Alec peaked from behind it, then walked in. His dark black hair didn't look at all brushed and he was wearing stripped pajama pants and a black T-shirt. His bright blue eyes fixed themselves with mine, and he smiled. "I thought you might be in here." He said making his way across the room to my table, picking up a dagger from the floor on the way.

"Hey." I said back as he took a seat in front of me.

"Gosh, I'm starving!" He leaned back gracefully, picking two of the chairs legs off of the tile.

"Let's go eat…" I suggested. I was predicting that he hadn't eaten for a while, either, maybe longer then me.

He got back up and threw the dagger at the wall. It stuck just above the door. "I thought you'd never ask."


	2. What's wrong?

**Ahhhhhhh, the Mortal Instruments. You tormented me with your wonderfulness. And Alec with your complete AWESOMENESS and ABILITY TO NOT DO ANYTHING AND MAKE ME LOVE YOU (Stupid Magnus…)**

**Disclaimer: The Mortal Instruments is not mine (Haha… Omigosh Valentine I don't have them!) I didn't word that right… I do not own the trilogy that's what I meant sooo….. Enjoy.**

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CHAPTER 2

*Clary's POV*

I sat beside Simon on his messy bed. It wasn't _that_ messy, but as close to messy as _I_ could get. My house was clean, _my mom and her clean obsession._ We were watching some show on his TV, well I wasn't really _watching _so much as _drawing_. His dark brown eyes were glued to the only movement in the whole room. _Or so I thought_. I turned my head a quarter inch to find him staring intently on me.

I grinned stupidly. I was totally comfortable around him, but his stare was odd. Not Simon-like. He smiled back showing a mouthful of perfect white teeth. "Hi, Simon."

"Hey, Clary" He was still smiling.

I gave him an oddly confused glance. "What?"

"You know, Clary, I'm not sure. You seem kinda out of it today…-"

_Really? _Then I looked down at my sketch pad. I had drawn a hand. Not my hand, but a much larger one, possibly a grown man's or maybe even a large teenage boy's. _I know not exactly strange_. But there were markings on the wrist leading in the invisible arm that I had not drawn yet. Strange ink looking ones. There was an eye looking one on the back of his hand, and an odd mess of beautiful swirls overlapping one another going down the arm.

"…Huh?" Simon finished.

I snapped out of my daydream and stared into his big eyes from behind his glasses. I shook my head to regain my thoughts and my head started to throb. "What?"

"I said what the hell is that? I mean, most of the time you draw… You know… Real things around a room but this…?" He gestured to my art.

I looked down at it again. I sighed. "I don't know. I mean I _do_ know… I _want_ to know. I remember drawing, just not this." It was true

"Well, you've been acting funny… ish."

I had to agree. I mean I've felt a change, but ignored it thinking it was like a weird girl hormone or stage that would pass eventually, but now my friend(s) have noticed it? "… Oh."

"Well?" He looked expectant.

"'Well?'" I repeated in the same tone.

"What's up? I know something's bothering you…"

I thought for a minute of to about what I was going to say, but I told Simon everything. And I would never lie to him. "I don't know what's wrong with me…"

*Alec's POV*

Sneaking out of the Institute wasn't at all hard. Well, we did it all of the time, and of course it wasn't hard. We're fast, strong Shadowhunters with only my sister and our "guardian" to hold us back.

My hands were in my jacket pocket curiously fumbling around for my stele. Once it was in my hand, I clasped it tightly, not daring to let it go. Something could happen at any moment (Of course, nothing ever did) but that wasn't the main reason I liked it so much. Not only did it make me feel safe, it made me feel like a _brave _Shadowhunter, more like Jace, _closer_ to Jace.

_Jace_

Wonderful, beautiful, strong, fast, smart-ass Jace. His golden eyes always looked at me with a brotherly affection. I wish he would see me through a new perspective. I've always wanted him to look at me the way _I _felt about him. I've always wanted something way more then brotherhood or friendship. I should be happy that at least I'm _someone _in his eyes, but not the right type for him, the right _gender _for him. What is love when there's a problem with how you're born? Someone that's born not to like the opposite sex has always been frowned upon among Shadowhunters. I would never be able to express my true feelings for Jace- ever. I'm a coward.

A shock of pain shot up my arm. With cat-like reflexes I pulled my hand out of my leather jacket to find four bloody indentions on my pale palm where my finger nails had dug into it. My jaw ached from biting my tongue and silver metallic taste began to form in my mouth. I suck the blood a little then gritted my teeth and forced myself not to scream my affections out loud. But I didn't.

Jace finally turned his head and looked at me. "You ok?"

_NO._ "Yeah, I'm fine." I clenched my fists to avoid talking, he usually never talked to me when I showed signs of anger. Sure enough he stopped talking, but a look of confusion remained on his gorgeous face.

We kept walking. Walking in silence until we reached Jace's favorite diner. We walked in casually and sat down. Nobody looked up from what they were doing but I could imagine some of the Downworlder's thoughts. _Nepilim._

I sat across from Jace looking at my shaking hands under the table. Then the usual waitress came over staring flirtatiously at him with pupiless eyes. _Kaelie. _As usual, of course, he would flirt back only to make her want him even more.

She gave us our menus and turned away giving Jace a quick wink. Jace waved and changed his position on his seat. I was still looking down, but could tell he was watching me intently. I looked up at him through the messy hair in my face, and smiled uncomfortably.

"Alec…? Something's bothering you. Are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm fine, Jace!" My hands slammed down on the table and my voice raised to a yell. "Everything is perfect, why the hell would something be wrong! My life is one big ball of sunshine." I had never been so angry, but with Jace I could never stay mad at him for long. I looked around the restaurant at everyone staring from me to Jace then back to me.

I glanced at Jace. "Hey, I'm sorry. I haven't been getting much sleep lately. It tends to make me emotional." I lied. Well, I emotional all of the time, and this just adds to the problem. I could hear Jace's voice in the back of my head, "_Yeah, that's why you slept for almost half of the day." _

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(A/N): Hi, ummmm anyone else who is reading my other stories, sorry that I haven't updated in a while. As I have already said , I will have those by the end of the week. And A NEW STORY! It shall be another Mortal Instruments fanfic. I don't know what it will be named yet, you know my name sooooooo you'll be able to find it quick, and even quicker if I tell you what it's about, but I'm not sure if I will or not… ok Let's make a deal. REVIEW right now and the quicker I shall update, post stories, etc.

**Thanks to all of the people that have subscribed to me as a writer! You have know idea how much I appreciate it (I like REVIEWERS too!) Hint: Hint: ROCK ON!**


	3. Busted

**Disclaimer: Yay! Alec will be doing chapter 4's disclaimer! Aren't you excited! Well, I am soooo get over it. I do not own the Mortal Instruments Trilogy (The books), The characters (Jace, Clary, Alec:( [I wish I owned Alec, he owns me :(], etc.**

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CHAPTER 3

*Jace's POV*

"I'm fine, Jace!" Alec slammed his fists onto our table, "Everything is perfect, why the hell would something be wrong! My life is just one big ball of sunshine." He was yelling and there was blood underneath his fingernails. I looked around and gave an apologetic smile to everyone that was staring at us like we were dating and Alec was breaking up with me. Their looks were sympathy, anger, and humor all into one facial expression, as Alec looked around in disbelief. He looked at me, "Hey, I'm sorry. I haven't been getting much sleep lately. It tends to make me emotional."

_Yeah, that's why you slept for almost half of the day. _And what in the world was he talking about? When wasn't he emotional? I was confused and in a way worried. Alec didn't seem ok, but he would tell me if something was wrong, of that I was certain.

He stared down at his menu, turning to the back to look at the normal food. I did the same, avoiding conversation with him. Kaelie came back carrying what we usually had to drink, coffee, completely black. She scooted closer to me, practically touching me. She smelled flowery. "What can I do for you?" She was looking at me, her blue eyes glowed seemingly. Her tone was flirty, with something else, maybe playfulness.

"Alec?" I didn't want to leave him out. Whenever Kaelie was around, or any girl for that matter, I forget completely about him.

"I'm not hungry." He mumbled. I rolled my eyes. Something was seriously wrong with him.

"I just want a burger- cooked please. Alec? Last chance…" I sounded like a mother talking to a child, which was severely unattractive, especially when he was a year older then me.

"NO!" That was a more forceful mumble, maybe even a little sassy, suggestive.

I turned and whispered to Kaelie, "Get him some fries. Oh, and two milkshakes." She nodded and flipped her hair into my face before walking away.

*Isabelle's POV*

I cleared the plates off of the table, throwing all of the food away. Hodge was still at the table reading his newspaper, completely dead to anyone who didn't know him, so I decided to find Jace and Alec. I walked down the seemingly endless hallway to the weapons room. The recognizable heavy doors were cold to the touch and easy to open. The familiar air spilled in from the doorway as I walked in. I looked around. A table and two chairs were positioned in the center of the far wall, one of them leaning against a pile of bags on two legs. _Alec._ It was proof that at least one of them was there. I turned back around find a dagger stuck perfectly just above the doorframe.

I shook my head and walked out shutting the doors behind me. I ran upstairs to Jace's room. I opened the doors. Nothing. Well except for this perfectly made bed, plain white walls, and spotless floors. I ran down to Alec's room. I slammed the doors open. They weren't there either. His room was the opposite of Jace's. His bed was not made, here and there the floor was dotted with weapons and some clothes, but it was fairly clean.

Then it hit me. They went to eat. It was hard to hide the fact that they did it everyday, but I pretended to notice. But today I wouldn't anymore. I ran across the hall to my room. Messier then anyone I had ever known. I put on my white dress and knee high boots on. I grabbed my lasso wrapped it around my wrist and headed downstairs. I ran through the chapel on the first floor and down the street to Jace's favorite diner.

I arrived and opened the doors causally. I looked around then spotted Jace and the back of Alec's head. Jace spotted me got and weird look on his face and mouthed, "Oh shit." He dived down under the table. I walked over with the grace of a Shadowhunter. I sat on the edge of the booth seat beside Alec. He jumped, then slid over giving me room. "Jace, it's for you…" Alec mumbled.

Jace's head popped up, "Oh hey, Izzy… What brings you here?" I took a sip of Alec's coffee. _Ew, black. _I coughed. He slid it over it him, looking offended.

"You're busted." I tried to sound serious, but the look on his face was too weird.

"Sorry, Isabelle." He was trying to strike me with guilt. Too bad I was merciless.

"Whatever, Jace. You didn't have to sneak here. I always knew you went here. That's what we should all start doing anyway…-"

"Please talk to your brother. He's like depressed or something." Jace gestured toward Alec.

"Jace, nothing's wrong!" He said through his teeth. His fists were balled, knuckles turning white. I grabbed his hands and forced them open. His palms were bleeding bad. Jace picked up a couple napkins and thrust them at me. I pressed them to Alec's pale skin.

"Alec, please tell me what's going on." Jace leaned over the table and put a hand on Alec's.

Alec shook his head and looked at me, the anger gone. "I'm fine." He squeezed Jace's hand, "I'm sorry."

*Alec's POV*

Jace's look was pleading. He reached for my hand. His hand was large, his fingers rough. My heart sank, and I no longer felt anything, just Jace's skin on mine. "I'm fine." I tightened my grip, my palm aching. "I'm sorry." I regained my composure, letting him go. He took his hand back.

"Good."

Kaelie returned with the food. She set two full glasses down each filled with a thick white liquid. She gave Jace a burger and me fries. I looked at Jace, who smiled. Kaelie nodded her head in Isabelle's direction, "Do you want something?"

Isabelle eyed my fries and shook her head, "I'm fine." When she left, Izzy poured ketchup on a plate and started eating.

"You could've gotten some, Izzy." Jace informed her.

"Not whenever your brother has food already here…" She took a sip of my milkshake, "Oh, did you want some, Alexander?"

I gave her a sarcastic look then shook my head. My sister simply shrugged and continued her meal.

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(A/N): Alright! REVIEW! I have given you two chapters in one day, now give me something I want, PLEASE! If you don't want to give me any criticism at least say hi and I'll give you wonderful thank you and maybe we can talk a little. Or give me the name of one of your stories and you shall be recognized on mine and maybe you'll get more fans! Or whatever they're called. Even give my ideas for more stories or ideas for this one! SORRY JUST LOOKING FOR WAYS FOR YOU GUYS TO REVIEW! PLEASE!

**Thanks! ROCK ON! XP **


	4. Confession

**ME: Hello! We have a SPECIAL person to do our disclaimer and help out with my authors note at the bottom! Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce to you…**

**ALEC: (mumbling) Alec Lightwood… Yeah you've already told them in the last chapter that I would be here doing this…**

**ME: Well, yeah… But I thought I would give you a proper introduction.**

**ALEC: (?) I'm just here to do the disclaimer…**

**ME: …**

**ALEC: Alex (LifesDisgrace) does not own the Mortal Instruments, it's characters, anything like that so don't think that she's totally trying to steal anything from it (Hint: Hint: ME?) Gosh nobody listens…-**

**ME: Alright Alec, that was wonderful! Thanks for telling everybody everything! Now while I explain to Alec why you aren't supposed to say stuff like that… Enjoy chapter 4!**

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CHAPTER 4

*Alec's POV*

We finished eating (Well, Izzy and Jace) then headed back to the Institute. Heading back we had nothing but silence, my guess was that they were trying to figure my bi-polar incident out. Personally, I was too. I don't think I would ever go to an extreme to get anything that I couldn't have. Isabelle didn't really look _that _worried, but I could tell she was uneasy. Jace, on the other hand, who never looked bothered, nervous, or even scared for that matter, but the look that was on his face definitely had all of those emotions rolled into one. But since my anger left easy mixed into the mix also. I'd have to make it up to him somehow.

We slowed our pace when we were on the walkway leading to the Institute. Especially me. I knew either Jace or Isabelle would be hounding me about what happened. It most likely was going to be Izzy, she was my sister so she would be more concerned or ecstatic with a weirded out emotion.

Once inside, I took the stairs, while Isabelle and Jace took the elevator. I dragged my feet up three flights of stairs to my room. I shut and locked he door, quietly. They probably already knew that I was going to my room, I just didn't need to make any noise and maybe they would forget about me. I sat of my bed, took my shoes off and threw them across the room. I changed out of my clothes and threw them somewhere, putting on another pair of jeans and a grey T-shirt.

I laid back and stared at my ceiling. Then a knock pounded on my door. It wasn't hard enough to be Jace and it wasn't light enough to be Hodge. It was just an annoyed sister knock. _Shit. _I got up and stood staring at the door making sure she was still there. She knocked again- much harder. I walked slowly over and unlocked it then went back in my bed.

Isabelle burst in still wearing her white dress. She had a golden bracelet around her wrist, well not a bracelet at all, it was her whip. Her magnificent weapon of choice, she had it all the time. "Hey."

"Hey, Isabelle…"

"Jace's worried about you… And so am I… What's wrong?" She sat beside me and put a sisterly hand on my lap.

"You wouldn't understand, and if I told you… I couldn't burden you with something like that." I really didn't sound like myself right now. I knew there was no way out of this and I would have to trust my sister with one of my biggest secrets. Of course I could trust her and knowing everything I thought of that instance made my tone, emotions, and actions completely different from how I acted.

"You can tell me anything." She hesitated, like she wasn't really ready for what I was about to tell her.

I too hesitated, not ready either, "I'm not attracted to… Girls."

Isabelle's face was understanding. "You mean you're…"

She already knew I could tell just by the first thing I said to her. But she didn't want to believe it. I decided to just come out and say it and leave the future to what ever course it would take. "Isabelle, I'm gay."

*Clary's POV*

I left Simon's house after explaining to him that I had no idea what was going on. I really didn't, I mean I had no idea what happened. As I walked down the street I looked around. I noticed I wasn't really in New York anymore. The town looked completely different from the one I was used to. I closed my eyes tightly, then opened them, squinting at first, then opening them fully to find the town that I had always known.

What _was _happening to me?

I reached my apartment. I fumbled in my jacket pocket for my key. I unlocked the door and walked in letting our "house's" chalky smell draw me in. I found my mother in the kitchen. Making what looked liked steak and chucky instant mashed potatoes. Wait, _chunky instant? _"Mom, let me help you…" I took the spoon from her and put more milk into the pot. It thinned it out a little, but a _layer _on the bottom was burned to it. I handed the spoon back to her. "No mashed potatoes…" I nodded my head in the direction of the trash can. My mother gave me a quick confused glance then looked down it the pot. She mouthed _"Oooooohhhhhh!"_ Then threw the contents away.

"Luke's coming over tonight. I hope you don't mind." She said sweetly.

"When isn't he here?" I said just before my mother's "friend" came from out of the living room. "Hey, Luke."

"Hey, Clary." He sat at the table and sipped some coffee.

"Uh, mom, I'm not hungry." I said dismissing myself. She nodded as I ran back to my room. I closed my door behind me and flung myself on my bed. I threw my jacket off and stared at what I had drawn earlier. My eyes closed and soon it seemed like I was dreaming with out an end.

_I was in a beautiful meadow no longer green, but colored with red. Sticky with an unfamiliar liquid. Well, not completely unfamiliar, I just hadn't felt it or seen it for at least a month. But the sky was a beautiful shade of blue and the flowers were untouched by blood. No bodies were lying on the ground, and the only sound for miles was the rapid pounding on my frightened heart. I looked down at my skin. The same markings that covered the hand that I had drawn, covered my chest, my stomach, my arms, my hands and even my legs. My neck ached like I had slept on it wrong. I walked forward, and found myself having difficulty breathing. A sharp pain suddenly hit my head and traveled down my spine. I fell to the blood coated ground and closed my eyes as my body was sent into a crashing darkness._

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(A/N): Soooooooo how was it? Like it not like it? REVIEW PLEASE!

**ALEC: Sure, review…**

**ME: Oooohhh and ever had a question for any character in the Mortal Instruments? There's a cool thing called "Fan Mail" in the Mortal Instruments section of FanFiction where you can ask, tell, etc. anything to the characters of an amazing trilogy! (author: Vasilisa Dragomir)**

**ALEC: It's really cool, you can ask me anything, or Jace anybody!**

**ME: Check it out! And please review! REVIEW! REVIEW!**

**ROCK ON!**

**ALEC: (?)**


	5. I would do anything

**ME: Hello. I've got two people to do the disclaimer today. I'm always going to have Alec, because well… (I love him…) 3 and….. (drum roll) Everyone's favorite (well, it seems like it, nobody likes Alec :( JACE HERONDALE! (slash Wayland, slash Morganstern, slash, Lightwood, but that's beside the point..)**

**JACE: I'm right here…**

**ALEC: (mouth open) me too…**

**ME: I'm sorry, Alec…! The truth is… I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU!**

**ALEC: ….(!)**

**JACE: Fine, just leave me out…**

**ME: Sorry Jace, ummmm why don't you give all these people their disclaimer…**

**JACE: (Rolls eyes) Alex (LifesDisgrace) does not own this trilogy she's just a FanFiction writer… That's forcing Alec and me to do this and-**

**ME: OK! (puts a hand over Jace's mouth) apparently you don't know how to do these things either… haha (that was supposed to be a nervous laugh) please enjoy haha (another nervous laugh)**

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CHAPTER 5

*Isabelle's POV*

I left my brother's room silently not exactly sure to say to someone that had just "come out" to me. Especially if that person was my older brother. Should I encourage him? Or try to change his mind about the opposite gender? I pondered until my head hurt and came to the conclusion that he was my brother, and that I would support him with whatever he chose to do with his life. He could do what he wanted to, and I would keep his secret safe for as long as he wanted me too.

I skipped downstairs and found Jace in a couch reading a big book. His eyes skimmed across the pages quickly and within a minute or two, he flipped the old yellow parchment and his eyes started going again. "Hey, Jace… What's up?"

Jace looked up at me, squinted sarcastically, the jammed a finger at the book. He widened his eyes.

Being energetic and keeping the Institute lifelike was hard when nobody appreciated what I was trying to do. I got up and left heading to my room Alec was in a bad mood, Jace was apparently occupied with something more interesting then me and Hodge wasn't much help to talk too. So I guess I would spend the rest of the day by myself.

I closed my door behind me and standing in the middle of the room, I looked around for something to do. Swords and daggers were piled in one corner of my room, and clothes were scattered along my floor. _I guess I could clean my room… Nah. _I threw some clothes and a book off of my bed and laid down. My sheets were soft and my pillow softer. The bed smells of clean cotton and sandy waters. I sat back up. _What was I doing? _I wasn't _tired_…

Bored, that's what I was. But it was almost 5 I could call in for dinner from a Chinese restaurant, maybe… Why not? The guys wouldn't eat anything I made and all of them were in some kind of predicament. So I was decided, even though they didn't appreciate me, I appreciated them and ordering them food was the most I was going to do. It was time they started looking after themselves.

*Alec's POV*

Isabelle left without saying a word. _Was it too much for her? _People are allowed to be what they want to be, right? Even an 18 year old Shadowhunter? I don't know why it was bothering me now… Isabelle wouldn't tell anybody. I decided to play it like nothing had ever happened and hoped for the best.

I went down to the library where I knew Jace was. No one really had to think about it… Jace was always reading or studying a weapon, learning new techniques for fighting, etc. I wasn't really _that _ready to face him, just wanted him to see that I wasn't really as psycho as the last time he had seen me. I sat down on a chair in the corner of the room. I stared at him intently. He looked untouched but the uneasiness was _KILLING_ me. I continued staring. Could he feel my gaze?

I suppose he could… Jace never even missed an ant crawling around on the floor. He was observant, but didn't _always_ notice things. I started reading a book (or pretended at least…) looking up at him every once in a while making sure he wasn't completely ready to murder me for what had happened earlier. I felt so freaking paranoid!

Jace turned around, his beautiful eyes meeting mine, making me sweat and my stomach turn. I managed a crooked smile, or close to one… I think. "… Hey Alec."

I raised an eyebrow.

He looked as if I had just shot him. He ran his fingers through his hair, something I had been longing to do for as long as I can remember. He raised his hands in the air as if he was being robbed.

I uncrossed my legs, set my book down, and got up. He looked at the book I had put on the table. My cheeks flushed. "Hey Jace."

Jace smiled and my heart pounded. I could feel and urge of some sort beginning to come along. I felt extremely dizzy, and after a moment I regained composure.

"You feeling alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I gagged a little.

Jace nodded his head, his curls bouncing as his head was once again in line with mine. His eyes flashed to the door just before Isabelle walked in smelling of Soy sauce and egg. We all exchanged glances almost as if we were communicating through our eyes, but none of us new what the other was saying. Each time Isabelle would look at me her glance would become grave and her blue eyes would widen. "Dinner's here." She said at last.

Jace raised her eyebrows and his ears perked up he ran out and down the hall to the kitchen.

Me and Isabelle stood in silence for a while. She opened her mouth and took a breath "Did-"

"Nothing happened, Izzy."

"Bu-"

"Izzy." I rasied my voice a bit. Then let it die down. "Drop it…"

She gave me an apologetic look and slightly nodded her head. She turned around and waited for me to stand beside her to walk her to dinner. She never did that… But this was a very confusing time for all of us.

I did what she silently told me to do. I wondered when I would stop doing things like this, if I was ever going to be "normal" again. I sighed. What would it take? I would do anything.

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Sorry this took sooooooooooooo sooooooo long. On my other stories it shall be no longer then a week for at least two chapters on those. And in the next week I shall have more chapters to this. REVIEW! Tell me about your stories and I'll tell other people about them in every one of my stories for the week. Ummm tell me about something you want to see happen in this… ANYTHING!

**Thanks, LifesDisgrace**


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